fear sets in

I have never changed a diaper.

I HOPE that the first diaper I change will belong to my first child. I have been in the same room as someone changing a diaper, which was horrible enough.

Lindsay went to the chiropractor just now because she twisted, pulled or pinched something that is making her walk like a 3-legged drunk. So I'm filling in for her as nanny (that's "man nanny" to you). The 10-month-old and the 3-yr-old are both napping. And I am taking a break from praying against poo to share my fear with you.

No lie, the little pooper just woke up. I can hear him on the monitor.

Dear God, please don't do this to me.

all sales are final

The yard sale was a huge success! We raked in $326, the Williams' made about $400, and the Axtell's... about $40. My wife is a savage negotiator, but not as bad as JW. A cute little old lady bought a picture frame from him, went home with it and discovered that it didn't fit. She came back with it, saw one that did fit and asked if he would exchange the frames. Jason's response:

"All sales are final, ma'am."

The next day we took Bella the Beast to the new Gilbert dog park. She's the biggest bully. She punked a Great Dane and a Schnauzer in a span of about 2 minutes. She's guardcore.

We got some volleyball action going at the Evjen's sweet pad... I get so cranky when people aren't as competitive as I am. Everyone's laughing but I'm yelling "Bump, set, spike! Bump, set, spike!" I need counseling.

yard sale

This Saturday is my first ever yard sale! Linds and I (along with like six couples from our small group) are loading up the Guardyard with all sorts of junk we don't want.

Come on by if you live in Chandler! If you're from out of state, this may be one worth cashing in on some frequent flier miles.

If at any time over the past few years you have given us a gift of sub par quality, please don't be upset if it has a price tag on it :) Our little house be cluttered up!!!

Here's the package deal: $265,000 gets you everything, house included.

it doesn't get much better than this

I read Carlos Whitaker's blog pretty much every day. This post from yesterday is why I do. Take a look, and tell me what you think!

Click HERE.

a breath of fresh air

If you ever need to be reminded what this whole Christian quagmire is all about, swing by this church on a Sunday when Mark Connelly is speaking. There were four or five times when I wanted to stand up and yell something like PrEaCh It BrOtHeR (but I was worried what the visitors might think). Plus I don't usually say things like that.

and oh, how He loves us so

I've watched this about eleven times over the past couple days. Found this one over at Carlos Whitaker's blog. Hope it does to you what it does to me!

trade ya

I can't afford an Xbox 360, so I'm going to need to get creative.

I'm willing to trade the following things for one:

My dog


My bed


My firstborn


My salvation


First taker, it's all yours.

warning

and don't go well together.

Do yourself a favor and wait at least 30 minutes before doing yard work after eating at Chipotle.

I'm feebling a dittle funby.

because I like to make things awkward...

Today I got an email from a girl who I dated for about a month. The relationship was cool and all, but one day we were hanging out and it had become obvious that it just wasn't working. So we broke up. This breakup was weird though... weird because it was so simple. So clean. So unemotional. The conversation went something like this:

"So... do you think this is working?"
"Not really, do you?"
"Nope, not really. I mean, you're great and all but..."
"Yeah, you too I mean it's just that..."
"Should we just break up?"
"Yeah, probably."
"Ok, Cool."
"Cool."
"Have a great day!"
"You too. Say hi to your dad for me.

It was seriously that easy. Don't you wish it was always that easy? Painless. Pure. Professional even!

But have you ever broken up, and known that it wasn't meant to be, but you saw them out flirting with someone... and it got under your skin a little? Like for you online daters, maybe you saw their profile back in action on Eharmony... or maybe their Facebook status went back to "looking for love" or whatever.

Today it happened to me:











(I don't care who you are, that's funny.)

new book

I just finished "Surprised by Hope" by NT Wright. I fervently recommend this one. This brotha speaks my language... well, actually there were probably a dozen words he used that I circled and had to look up on dictionary.com, like "recondite". Apparently I like hyper links.

Shane Claiborne's latest book "Jesus for President" is on deck! Why doesn't anyone tour through Arizona? How do you go to ALBUQUERQUE, but not Phoenix? You're going to drive past us to go there?

So... what book are you reading right now?

holy week

I found some great videos for Holy Week (via Jonny Baker). There's one for each day. You're a day behind, so go get started :)

Here you go.

Makes me wish I had a sweet accent... then I'd be the man!

spent the day in

Cincinnati.

Remember this show?












Wedding yesterday and a church visit today. Good times.
This Ohio trip is damaging my blogging career.
Happy Palm Sunday :)

a perfect gift

Lindsay watches the two cutest kids on the planet, William and Jackson. I got to hang with them a little bit today. William's three and Jackson's 9-months.



Go ahead and soak in the cuteness for a sec...

They went to lunch today at Burger King. I got a call from Linds saying I should come outside to the driveway because Will had a present for me. I thought maybe it would be some leftover fries, an apple turnover, or maybe one of those sweet crowns. Nope. It was a necklace from one of those toy capsule machines... you know the ones.

The truth is that it's a goofy necklace. It's market value in somewhere in the range of about a penny. Even if Justin Timberlake wore the thing and started a new sweet trend, the trend would pass in a few months, as all trends should.

But to William, it was a perfect. And that makes it perfect to me. I didn't tell him about the market value or trend-setting potential of the necklace he chose for me. He loved it, so much that he bought one for himself too, so that we could share in the joy of this Burger King treasure.

Why would it be any different with our relationship with God?

His gift let me take a deep breath and worry less about the font on my resume', or which sermon on DVD I would mail to so and so that might impress them, or which outfit to wear for my next church visit... Because "man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart."

hope

I've been digging into NT Wright's latest this week, "Surprised by Hope". If you're a reader, this is worth reading. Especially if you've read any of the Left Behind gibberish. The book is all about future judgment, and how the church has screwed the whole doctrine up.

Check this ditty out from page 141:

"The main point to notice, once more, is that all future judgment is highlighted basically as good news, not bad. Why so? It is good news, first, because the one through whom God's justice will finally sweep the world is not a hard-hearted, arrogant, or vengeful tyrant but rather the Man of Sorrows, who was acquainted with grief; the Jesus who loved sinners and died for them; the Messiah who took the world's judgment upon himself of the cross."

When you think of JESUS and JUDGMENT at the same time, what sort of picture comes to mind? Even if your picture of Jesus includes him in a tuxedo t-shirt, you may be closer to the truth than many pastors I've heard speak on the topic.

all things new

6 years, 2 months, and 6 days ago that I started working at Cornerstone.

2,257 days later... I'm done. Today was my last day.

If you like big numbers (wink) then maybe this will help. It has been 195,004,800 seconds, 3,250,080 minutes, 54,168 hours, or 322 weeks since day one.

That accounts for roughly 21% of the 10,697 days I've been alive.

Thank you to my friends who have been a part of that 21%. Whether for weeks, months or years, I'm so grateful for you today. I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat!

Linds and I are headed up north for the weekend. No phones, laptops, meetings, alarm clocks, floors to mop, weeds to pluck, or anything else.

Enjoying a peace that transcends.

I'm busy even when I'm unemployed

I put my hook in the water a week ago, and I've had about twenty bites already. I was sorta hoping to just sit with my line in the water for a month, read a bunch of books, walk the dog, pull the weeds, paint something? Just about every bite is from California or Florida. Apparently God wants me to have a tan.

If you've got the hookup, tell IJM to stop sending me rejection letters!

three more days

...until everything changes.

I'm excited to wake up on Friday and discover who I am when I'm not paid to be a Christian.

I'm excited to see how God takes this muddy mess of a situation and breaths life into it. I'm excited to be a part of that restoration.

I'm excited to be a stay-at-home husband... for at least a month.

I'm excited to walk into the unknown, and to be completely dependent on God.

I'm excited for my marriage. This has brought so much good stuff. Painful, but good.

I'm excited to not carry this burden any more.

I'm excited about the change that I think this whole situation is going to bring for the church that I've loved for so long.

I'm excited to go to bed...

loved

I've never felt more loved, valued and affirmed than I do right now.

If you aren't up to speed on why that might be, I announced today that Cornerstone has asked me to step down from my position in the high school ministry. That's a nice buttery way of saying that I was fired. When the parents heard the reasons why, it got very interesting in there.

I know I'll want to write about this in detail soon, but for now, I just need to say thank you to the parents, students, and friends in that room today. Today made everything I've ever done worthwhile.